If it’s true that our species is alone in the universe, then I’d have to say that the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.ġ2. Honesty may be the best policy, but it’s important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.ġ1. If the Cincinnati Reds were really the first major league baseball team, who did they play?ġ0. You can’t fight City Hall, but you can goddamn sure blow it up.ĩ. Now I’m an American - you know, you grow.Ĩ. That’s the whole meaning of life: Not dying! I figured that shit out by myself in the third grade.ħ. Have you ever noticed that their stuff is shit and your shit is stuff?Ħ. A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff.ĥ. Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.ģ. I don’t have pet peeves - I have major psychotic fucking hatreds!Ģ. In no particular order here are his 101 best…ġ.
Even a list of 101 quotes is just scratching the surface. In the process he’s pissed off a lot of people and accumulated some of funniest, and most controversial, quotes known to man. George Dennis Carlin was born in New York City and for the last 47 years he’s been doing stand-up comedy better than anyone else on the planet. George would say that’s irony, not a coincidence. The man who says “life is worth losing” turns 70 today.